Editor, Times Union:

The death of a child is a devastating loss. I want to publicly express my gratitude to all who have taken the time to share with me their memories and special stories of my son, Burdett Wappes, who died suddenly on Sunday, Oct. 10, 2004.

It has been an encouragement to hear how he touched the lives of others in our community. So many people have spoken about his kindness, and his willingness to help others. He served as an acolyte and enjoyed activities at St. Anne's Episcopal Church. He generously gave great hugs and his beautiful smile to family and friends.

We remember him with his headphones on listening to music, weight-lifting, doing handsprings, taking care of his car, doing well as a junior at Warsaw High and worrying about his girlfriends. Burdett was a happy 17-year-old looking forward to driving, to graduating from high school, joining the military and to becoming a police officer one day.

It seems impossible that this healthy, happy young man's life could end so suddenly. Because so many people have asked questions about his death, I want to share what we have learned from the autopsy. Burdett was ill with what seemed to be the flu. He saw a doctor at Medstat on Friday afternoon, Oct. 8, 2004, and was prescribed an antibiotic, cough medicine and fever reducer for an upper respiratory infection. Less than 48 hours later, he passed away in his sleep.

The autopsy showed that Burdett died of double pneumonia. The toxicology report states that there was neither a drug overdose nor a drug reaction. As hard as it is to understand, he simply died of congestion in his lungs. "Natural causes" is the official phrase. Of course, nothing is natural about a young life ending far too soon. Thank you for remembering Burdett and for your kindness to me and our family.

Annette Wappes
Warsaw

Times-Union, 12-21-2004

     It matters not who Burdett's parents were.  It doesn't matter that he was adopted by his maternal grandmother at the age of 4.  It doesn't matter that he had Major depression, ADHD, a learning disability or Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.  It doesn't matter that his IQ was 70. 
     What matters is that Burdett loved everyone he met.  Well, almost everyone.  There were times when he would get mad and say things that he really didn't mean.  Burdett was always there for you no matter what.  He gave his love freely and in great abundance.  He would take care of his friends no matter what the cost to himself.  He was always willing to pay for someone's lunch or share his when he didn't have money to give.  He was always witnessing for Christ to the kids at school and the little kids in Children's Chapel.  He made 'being kind' an asset not a detriment.
      He loved to be funny and play practical jokes or tell an 'off-color' story, sometimes; when he could get away with it.  He loved to do handsprings and the last time I saw him do them was at a church function called 'Buffalo Days' when all the kids were doing a talent show and Burdett chose to do handsprings until we were afraid he would hurt himself.  It was great to see how the kids and parents cheered and clapped for him.
     He loved to play with kids and would have been a great father if he'd had the chance.  He wasn't afraid to tell people, especially his girlfriends, that he respected them and wasn't going to have sex until he got married.  He told his Mom and Dad that he loved them, but he didn't want to be the kind of parent they were; he was going to be with his children no matter what.
     Burdett loved his country and told me often how he was going to join the National Guard to fight for and protect his country and the people that live here.  He did apply to the National Guard in Warsaw, and he would have made a good soldier; although I don't know what it would have done to him to hurt another human being, let alone kill one.  Burdett was a gentle soul for all his bravado and braggadocio.  Sometimes he had testosterone overflow; I think that's just a part of being a teen-age boy.
     For me, Burdett was a great son, even though I didn't give birth to him, he was my son from the time I adopted him, actually more like since his birth.  His parents were both 15 when he was born.  We had some awful times and we had some bad times, but most of the time it was wonderful. We were so close that sometimes it was hard to tell where he left off and I began; sort of a mirror image, if you will.
     I almost lost him when he was in a fatal car accident on January 2, 2004; so when he wanted to go live with his Mom after school was out in May of 2004, I gave him back to her.  He only lived 5 months in her care, but during that time he was able to grow into a happier young man and it gave them time to re-bond before he left this world.
     If I had it to do over again, I would have cherished him more and like all parents, I would rather be the one to leave this veil of tears.  It hurts so much to be without him and to know that I have to go on when I don't know how or why.  I miss his wonderful hugs, his smiles that lit up the room, and hearing him say, "I love you, Momma."

Believe that today
will bring you courage
and tomorrow will
bring you hope.

In Loving Memory of
Burdett Lee Wappes
May peace be with him
as he rests in heaven
with our Lord.
We will miss you and love you.

The first time he met me
He was two years old
My head was bare
as the body of a newborn gerbil.
My eyes were big and brown
and stared back up at him;
He thought he was  looking
into the eyes of a puppy.
His face was as bright
as the sunrise on a May morning
when the morning mist has cleared.
My miniature hands reached out
clutching the ends of his chestnut hair,
pulling each strand.
My small fingers and little toes
were still pinkish,
sensitive to the touch of caring hands
My mouth made soft gurgling noises
and little bubbles formed on the edge of my lips.

With Love,             Trista